Quick Tips to be Happy

happy - Therapy in London

Everyone’s happiness is individual, and nothing should be more important than your own happiness.

What will make you happy? Some say, ‘money.’

 ‘If I were rich I would be happy and all my problems would be gone.’

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Lets Talk About It

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In life we are expected to be great all of the time. There is no room for unexpected feelings to get in the way.  The famous phrase ‘Keep calm & carry on’ exemplifies that fact. Just keep pushing through until everything is ‘fine’. What cost is there however, to not talking through our problems?

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My response to: Real Men Do Do Therapy

men do therapy - Therapy in London

 It was interesting to see this month’s GQ (Gentlemen’s Quarterly) leading with an article (Real Men Do Do Therapy) on psychotherapy, Therapy and counselling for men by Loise Chunn the founder of Welldoing.org
The British ‘stiff upper lip’ has seen men choosing not to come to therapy, instead of feeling obliged to deal with any issues themselves which usually involves keeping it locked in their head and using addictions,  legal and illegal drugs (to name a few) to ease their emotional pain.

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Trolling and Virtual Identities

trolling - Therapy in london

In recent times, ‘trolling’ has become a part of the digital world. Becoming a part of many of our virtual identities.

These are actions that many of us wouldn’t even think of being a part of in the physical world. Yet seem normal in our virtual world and become part of our social identity.

A recent article in the Evening Standard by Benjamin Cohen highlights the trend of Trolls. In the article, the author discussed how many send sexually explicit pictures of themselves to strangers on social media.

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Tens of thousands of Londoners hooked on web porn and games

Internet addiction Therapy in london

Are you finding yourself spending more and more time on your laptop, tablet or smartphone?

An article in the  Evening Standard newspaper recently addressed the growing trend in Londoners becoming addicted to the the internet. Ten’s of thousands of us are “hooked on web porn and games”; To name but a few of the internet-based activities people partake in.

London Lifestyle

London is a busy place and as a result, we need some downtime to distress after our busy day. We spend so much of our working life on some kind of technological platform at work, that it seems only natural to continue using technology when we finish.

I can hear many of you say, ‘well what’s the problem with using my phone to distress after a long day at work?’

Unlike reading a book or a newspaper, the apps on our smartphones and on the internet are laced with addictive mechanics that keep us coming back again and again.

Game Mechanics

You didn’t lose that game of Candy Crush because you picked the yellow candy chain over the purple one, but because the game mechanics did not want you to continue.

Forget for a moment apps with addictive game mechanics built in; how about phone calls and text messages?

Do you find yourself checking and rechecking your phone for messages even when on the tube with no signal? You do that because you have no one watching you, checking up on you or judging you.
It’s your virtual world in which you can do and be whoever you want, with no consequences. It slowly becomes easier and more comfortable to live within the medium of the virtual world rather than the physical one.

Mirrored by comments in the article by the Psychiatrist Dr Henrietta Bowden-Jones who states:
“We see people who prefer their virtual life to daily reality, who can arrive extremely obese and haven’t moved for weeks, or I have seen people who are extremely thin and malnourished.”

The Virtual World

The ease of the virtual world becomes all consuming. We don’t need to impress the opposite sex because there is pornography to suit any taste. We can feel powerful by humiliating someone on Twitter or levelling up on World of Warcraft. Our virtual identities become more important than our physical ones.

This is not isolated to London, but is happening up and down the country.  When one worried mother contacted the psychologist she stated “When I contacted Henrietta she said I was the fifth person that week.”

With the London lifestyle so fast paced, competitive and stressful. It is not surprising me that we seek a quick technology fix to quell our anxiety.
Just like drugs, legal and illegal, we must notice when we are in control of them or whether it is in control of us.

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5 ways Room (Movie) draws parallels to the Oedipus complex

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I recently saw, ‘Room‘ (Original novel and screenplay by Emma Donoghue) which follows the story of a mother and son (Jack, aged 5) trapped in a room by a male abductor.

 

The story is told from the perspective of the 5-year-old who was born in the room. He has lived within the confines of the four walls his entire life.  His only relationship is with his mother, who gives her undivided attention; cooks cleans and cares for him.  He makes sense of the outside world through 2 or 3 TV channels, which to him, ‘magic TV land’.

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Anti-depressants ‘no more effective than counselling’

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A study published in the British Medical Journal (BMJ) has found that anti-depressants are no more effective than counselling.

The rate of prescription drugs tackling depression has doubled in the last 10 years with “57.1 million prescriptions dispensed in 2014. Yet in my experience, a number of counselling services have dropped in recent years due to, as many of them say ‘ lack of funding.’ It is important to remember that, like any plan, the Cedar Point Rehab review will only be reimbursed according to what is listed and mentioned in the Benefit Summary.

The report states that sometimes, people have to take the anti-depression drugs like pendulum dowsing instead of counselling. This is due to the “limited access to counselling, where there are often long waiting lists”.

Need for Counselling

More and more people require mental health services. Why is it that funding has been cut for services that many people suffering from depression want and need? The Professor of Psychological Medicine at King’s College London’s Institute of Psychiatry, Psychology & Neuroscience, states that the highest rates of recovery from sober homes are from those having both together. 

It seems that we are letting down the people in need of mental health services. When, in fact, the need for mental health services is rising.

Therapy in London

 

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Smartphones vs Thinking Space

thinking space Therapy in London

Smartphones have made the internet and connectivity ever present. We take our phones wherever we go and feel lost without them. We feel we need connectivity but, as discussed previously, it is a much deeper need than that.

 

Smartphones are our catalyst for instant gratification. Any time we feel bored or restless we can pick up our phone and get a little spike of serotonin by looking at a picture of a funny cat. Validating our virtual image on social media, or catching a missed call or text.

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