We all have flashes of anger and rage throughout the day. I could be that someone cuts you up while driving, your boss shouted at you at work or a partner didn’t do the washing up.
You may think anger and rage are the same emotion but actually quite different.
What is the difference?
Anger is a constructive emotion, telling you that something isn’t right and that you need to change or confront an area of your life that you are not happy with.
It may be the way you have been treated by a friend or family member or being unhappy at work.
Anger is a positive, controlled and life-affirming response to a situation, both emotionally and cognitively led. It allows you to assert yourself whilst establishing what you need and wants in that moment.
On the other hand, rage is an unyielding, explosive and uncontrollable response to a situation.
Rage can come from always putting others needs before our own. Pushing ourselves to one side because, maybe, we don’t feel worthy of putting ourselves first.
Rage is all the emotion, suppressed and built up inside of us, whether that is anger, frustration or sadness that we have been harbouring for however long. This feeling is something we have been holding onto, unable to dispel safely, exploding out of us in the blink of a moment.
It does not respond to any emotional or cognitive response. It needs to be heard there and then, which is why many run from it. We know that if rage is solicited we will lose control in that moment.
Rage seems scary then, not just in regards to being the recipient of rage, but also in feeling our own.
How to control Rage
If we acted on the emotions we have been burying for so long (such as anger), maybe we wouldn’t need to be rageful to show others how we feel.
Try listening to your suppressed emotions rather than burying them, think about how you can relieve your anger. What is that voice trying to tell you?
Look at and dispel those untouchable emotions so you can control them, using them to enhance your life rather than allowing those emotions to control you.