Do you ever feel that tinge of hatred to yourself about something you say or do?
Hating yourself is not only detrimental to your happiness but can also hurt your chances of getting to live the life you want for yourself.
Is it easy to hate yourself and when I say that, I mean it’s easier to beat yourself up than to tell someone else that they have upset you or done something wrong.
You can say that it’s your fault people treat you like that or life doesn’t go your way as no one is going to argue back, shout at you or generally cause any tension or friction. So, instead of blaming anyone else, you say it’s your fault, I am the problem.
How do you stop it?
The first step is to realise that you are not always the problem. Sometimes people can be at fault and sometimes life doesn’t deal you the best hand. You have to better your self-confidence that is what’s going to help you in the future.
Next, start telling people when they step out of line. This is a hard step to master but it all stems from feeling confident. By expressing to others how you feel, it will relieve the tension and set new boundaries with others.
The following step is, to be frank with yourself and think, what don’t I like about my life?
It could be anything from your body shape to your job or your hobbies. And with that knowledge set about trying to change it. If we take body shape as an example, work out a plan to exercise more, cut calories or generally be healthier with what you eat.
Finally, go out and do it. You can plan forever but set yourself a time to go and make these changes.
Loop of self-blame
You are stuck in a loop of self-blame and stagnation because it feels easier to do that than to make a change. By realising you are not the problem and you have the power to make drastic changes in your life it’s going to allow you to feel empowered, motivated and more like your true self.